Do what you can

I walked last year at the Women's March, and felt awestruck, and proud to be there. Strong and happy. Today I attended the rally for March for Our Lives and for the most part I just felt sad. I felt sad that the teens who were speaking had to be telling stories of growing up in a reality that has always included gun violence. I felt sad that I felt an unease at being at a large public gathering. I felt sad when they read the names of the Parkland students. I felt sad when a teen poet read about what it must have been like being at the Pulse nightclub, and how when she DJs she watches people more carefully, how metallic glints catch her eye, how she watches the security guard while he is texting instead of watching the dance floor. I was glad to be there, glad to show support for the growing movement that will hopefully topple the NRA and it's grip on politicians. But looking up at the sunshine and blue sky, listening to people laugh, watching dogs nosing around for attention, it just felt surreal. I don't know what the answer is. I bought some new art supplies and tomorrow will be a quieter more reflective day. I'll do what I can to bring a smile to some faces, and appreciate what surrounds me. I'll do what I can.