Sketchbook thoughts

Some days I really feel like I am struggling with Being Me. A lot of the time Being Me seems to be more like Being the Person Who Reacts to Everyone Else.

I have a vision of who I want to be, a mythical person who is confident, knows what she wants, is able to communicate effectively, and, of course, has perfect skin. Some days I think I fake it pretty well (except the perfect skin part), but other days I am presented with a challenge and the little bunny in me shuts down.

Yesterday I had a challenge, and I am still dwelling on it. Picking it apart. Trying to decide how I want to react. Trying to decide if I am making too much of it (pretty sure I am), and trying to decide what reaction will make my anxiousness rise or fall. It’s borderline crazy how much brain space I will allocate to trying to figure out if the way I’m feeling is “right” or not.

All this added up to not sleeping a lot last night, and this morning was a little rough. As was the afternoon. I worked, I walked, I chatted with a few folks. This was one of my morning sketches. Just keeping it honest here.